THURSDAY, September 14 is National RUOK Day, so, “Happy RUOK Day”!

But the reality is not all of our friends, family members and work colleagues are "happy" or even OK.

Maybe you’re not feeling that good about yourself.

There can be daily pressures that get us down, like criticism from a customer or work colleague. Maybe there’s something more serious going on; trouble on the home front, financial problems or a feeling of pressure that goes on and on.

But there are always strategies for getting us through those difficult times, for increasing our resilience ahead of those low moments, and seeing a health professional skilled in these areas can really make a huge difference, now and in the long term.

And today is a day to think about mental health – our own and that of family members, friends and workmates.

And the message is: “A conversation could change a life.” And it can.

Maybe you’ve a feeling that someone you know or care about isn’t behaving as they normally would? Perhaps they seem out of sorts? More agitated or withdrawn? Or they’re just not themselves. Trust that gut instinct and act on it. Learn more about the signs and when it's time to ask R U OK?

By starting a conversation and commenting on the changes you’ve noticed, you could help that family member, friend or workmate open up.

In case they say they are not OK, you need to be ready with a helpful response. That doesn’t mean you should be trying to fix the problem for them but, if they’re ready to talk, a conversation with someone they trust can help.

“How can I help?”

“Have you thought about seeing your doctor?”

“What would help take the pressure off?”

Simply stopping by to say “hi”, arranging to meet for a coffee or picking the right moment for a chat. It could come at just the right time and that’s what RUOK Day is all about.

Think about mental health, your own and that of your friends, and get yourself ready to help if the need arises – that’s what friends do, they look out for each other.

But before you can look out for others, you need to look out for yourself. And that’s OK too. If you're not in the right headspace or you don't think you're the right person to have the conversation, try to think of someone else in their support network who could talk to them.

To help you decide whether you’re ready to start a meaningful conversation, ask yourself:

AM I READY?

• Am I in a good headspace?

• Am I willing to genuinely listen?

• Can I give as much time as needed?

AM I PREPARED?

• Do I understand that if I ask how someone’s going, the answer could be: “No, I’m not”?
• Do I understand that I can’t ‘fix’ someone’s problems?
• Do I accept that they might not be ready to talk? Or they might not want to talk to me?

PICKED MY MOMENT?

• Have I chosen somewhere relatively private and comfy?
• Have I figured out a time that will be good for them to chat?
• Have I made sure I have enough time to chat properly?

Take the time, as part of RUOK Day to check on your own mental health and to equip yourself to help others.

And be part of the day if you can.

There may be events going on at your workplace or local area. For example, there’s an RUOK Morning Tea at Wonthaggi Library today, Thursday, September 14, 2023 from 10am to 11am. Check out Eventbrite for tickets or call the library on 5672 1875.

If this subject raises anxiety levels and you feel as if you can't keep yourself or others safe immediately. call Emergency Services on Triple 0 (000). If you have concerns about feelings of depression or stress you can call Lifeline on 131114 for a chat, they can also help you contact other referral services.